The problem with ideas is that some of them are not very good, some are plain bad and some are so ridiculous that they are locked away behind a door in the mind and forgotten about. The problem with alcohol is that it unlocks that door.
On the eve of the millennium I made a resolution, no more New Year’s resolutions! I thought to myself, what is the point in making yet another resolution that will waste time, cost money and ultimately fail. This was a resolution I kept for a decade until the stroke of midnight on the thirty first of December 2009 when a door unlocked. I made a new resolution, and in turn broke my only successful resolution to date.
So what was this new resolution? Something simple, to ease me back in with at least a chance of success? Perhaps resolving not to eat mint club biscuits on a Tuesday morning. Or did I go with something worthwhile, like saving the lesser spotted urban cheetah from extinction? No I decided to try and make a million pounds in one year.
I blame the alcohol. Specifically I blame the ‘Jager Train’. Whose idea was it for a large number of people to set their ambitions for the year ahead whilst under the influence of the greatest possible amount of alcohol from the year before? Perhaps there is a god and he does have a sense of humour.
It could be worse, I could be the one who boldly proclaimed after more Jack Daniels than should be humanly possible to consume, to pogo-stick up the Eiffel tower (in a teenage mutant ninja turtle costume). Is this resolution ridiculous, definitely, impossible, probably, but why not?
So what exactly would earning one million pounds in a year take?
- £83,333 per month
- £19,231 per week
- £2,740 per day
- £114 per hour
Now all I have to do is find a job that pays twenty times the minimum wage and work every hour of every day without sleep or sustenance. I can’t believe everyone isn’t doing it.
Until I get offered the high paid job and someone eliminates the need for sleep (an invention that would surely be worth at least a million), I’m going to try every idea that pops into my head (yes the same head that came up with the ridiculous concept of making a million pound in a year).
But even as one part of my mind foolishly declared to try and make a million pounds in a year another part gave myself a chance at succeeding, an unconscious get out of jail free card, a small grammatical slip. I don’t have to make a million pounds this year, I just have to try to make a million pounds, and that at least I have a chance at.
Happy New Year, and I wish you every success with your resolution. And who knows, I doubt I will become a millionaire, but maybe this time next year we will be reading about a triumphant teenage mutant ninja turtle, atop the Eiffel tower, pogo stick in hand.
On the eve of the millennium I made a resolution, no more New Year’s resolutions! I thought to myself, what is the point in making yet another resolution that will waste time, cost money and ultimately fail. This was a resolution I kept for a decade until the stroke of midnight on the thirty first of December 2009 when a door unlocked. I made a new resolution, and in turn broke my only successful resolution to date.
So what was this new resolution? Something simple, to ease me back in with at least a chance of success? Perhaps resolving not to eat mint club biscuits on a Tuesday morning. Or did I go with something worthwhile, like saving the lesser spotted urban cheetah from extinction? No I decided to try and make a million pounds in one year.
I blame the alcohol. Specifically I blame the ‘Jager Train’. Whose idea was it for a large number of people to set their ambitions for the year ahead whilst under the influence of the greatest possible amount of alcohol from the year before? Perhaps there is a god and he does have a sense of humour.
It could be worse, I could be the one who boldly proclaimed after more Jack Daniels than should be humanly possible to consume, to pogo-stick up the Eiffel tower (in a teenage mutant ninja turtle costume). Is this resolution ridiculous, definitely, impossible, probably, but why not?
So what exactly would earning one million pounds in a year take?
- £83,333 per month
- £19,231 per week
- £2,740 per day
- £114 per hour
Now all I have to do is find a job that pays twenty times the minimum wage and work every hour of every day without sleep or sustenance. I can’t believe everyone isn’t doing it.
Until I get offered the high paid job and someone eliminates the need for sleep (an invention that would surely be worth at least a million), I’m going to try every idea that pops into my head (yes the same head that came up with the ridiculous concept of making a million pound in a year).
But even as one part of my mind foolishly declared to try and make a million pounds in a year another part gave myself a chance at succeeding, an unconscious get out of jail free card, a small grammatical slip. I don’t have to make a million pounds this year, I just have to try to make a million pounds, and that at least I have a chance at.
Happy New Year, and I wish you every success with your resolution. And who knows, I doubt I will become a millionaire, but maybe this time next year we will be reading about a triumphant teenage mutant ninja turtle, atop the Eiffel tower, pogo stick in hand.
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